Eavesdropping at the Nail Salon
Saturday, November 15, 2008 Posted In callouses , guffaw , hammer toe , Malaysian , mumble , pedicure Edit This 1 Comment »
I went to get a pedicure today. My second time ever. I sat down and put my feet in the water. The Malaysian girl mumbled something unintelligible.
"Um...'scuse me?"
"Mumble, mumble, shooshly wug!"
"No, sorry, I'm not getting it."
"Humph..." the girl waves at something.
What? I give up.
"Oh, ok, if you think so." I say, hoping this appeases her. It seems to work. She nods and resumes working then immediately starts chatting in Malay to the girl next to her. They talk and laugh and occasionally glance at me while they work and as they do this a suspicion forms in my mind.
I bet they're talking about ME!
I am convinced that I know exactly what they are saying. Here is how it went...
"Can you believe this white lady came in with hooves like this?! When do you think the last time she had a pedicure was? 1900?" (Laugh, cackle.)
"Have you ever seen such a bad case of hammer toe in your life? It's a wonder she can walk! And those callouses! It's gonna take me years to shave those off!" (Guffaw, guffaw.)
I.
CAN'T.
BELIEVE.
SHE.
SAID THAT!
I am NOT WHITE! I AM A MAORI!
"Um...'scuse me?"
"Mumble, mumble, shooshly wug!"
"No, sorry, I'm not getting it."
"Humph..." the girl waves at something.
What? I give up.
"Oh, ok, if you think so." I say, hoping this appeases her. It seems to work. She nods and resumes working then immediately starts chatting in Malay to the girl next to her. They talk and laugh and occasionally glance at me while they work and as they do this a suspicion forms in my mind.
I bet they're talking about ME!
I am convinced that I know exactly what they are saying. Here is how it went...
"Can you believe this white lady came in with hooves like this?! When do you think the last time she had a pedicure was? 1900?" (Laugh, cackle.)
"Have you ever seen such a bad case of hammer toe in your life? It's a wonder she can walk! And those callouses! It's gonna take me years to shave those off!" (Guffaw, guffaw.)
I.
CAN'T.
BELIEVE.
SHE.
SAID THAT!
I am NOT WHITE! I AM A MAORI!
1 brilliant observations:
Each time I get a pedicure (not often enough) I hope just for once someone is speaking Chinese and I can play "Gotcha!"
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