I lined up with the crowd of people who had to go into the courthouse. After a few minutes I got to the front of the line and placed my bag, phone and keys on the security conveyor belt. As I stepped through the metal detector the alarm beeped. I turned to the two elderly security guards and shrugged. I emptied my pockets and they motioned for me to walk through again.
Hand-held metal detector... "beeeeeeep."
I looked helplessly at the security guard in front of me. He said, in an unnecessarily loud voice... "HMMM, I'M WONDERING... YOU'RE NOT WEARING ONE OF THOSE NEW-FANGLED UNDERWIRE BRAS ARE YA?" (pointing to my boobage)
Every head in the line behind me swivelled in my direction as I tried to answer this question in a dignified manner.
"Uh... yes, I think I may be wearing one of those..."
"SPEAK UP THERE, MA'AM!" he fairly screamed at me. "YOU'LL HAVE TO SAY IT INTO MY OTHER EAR... I'M A LITTLE HARD OF HEARING IN THIS ONE!"
"NO NEED TO BE EMBARRASSED MA'AM!" he shouted, "IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME! THEY'RE USING STURDY WIRE IN THOSE CONTRAPTIONS AND THEY ALWAYS SET THE ALARM OFF!" (Snorts and chortles to his ancient cohort.)
I made a hasty red-faced exit.
I have since discovered that security staff have the right to ask you to remove your new-fangled contraption before granting you entrance.
A bit of advice... wear your "non-fangled" contraption when you next go through a metal detector.
Save yourself the humiliation.