Slashing and Slamming

Saturday, February 07, 2009 Posted In , , , , Edit This 13 Comments »
There have been a lot of people knocking on our door. Selling cleaning products, magazines, newspapers, bug spraying services and landscaping. As the economy worsens, we even have little kids running up to us on the street with bags of tamales to sell.

We had been slashing dead palm fronds off the twenty or so palm trees that some palm obsessed idiot planted on our property before we owned it. Well, to be honest, MM did the ladder climbing and cutting and I watched and offered excellent 'slashing advice'.

So... after a strenuous afternoon... we had a thigh-high pile of dead palm fronds on the driveway. I knew the kids could have endless fun with the mess but the HOA would rear it's Medusa heads at us before long, so we arranged to have it removed in a few days.


The next day there was a knock at the door. A man asked me if I wanted the 'mess' removed. He promised to get it done quickly. I asked him how much.

He said, "Three."
Moi: "Three? Three what? Three drachmas? Three yen?"
Him: "Ah... three hundred."
Moi: "DOLLARS??!"
Him: "Yes."

I was so incredulous I just started laughing. I thought he was joking. Then mid-laugh I realised he wasn't joking because he was standing there with a puzzled look on his face, so it turned from a "Ha, ha great joke!" laugh to a "You've GOT TO BE KIDDING me!" laugh, to a "GET OFF MY PROPERTY!" laugh. If there is such a thing.

Then I shut the door. Still laughing. Probably hysterically by now. M was looking at me strangely.


Then later, I came upon M telling his father about it saying, "Then she laughed and SHUT THE DOOR IN HIS FACE dad!"

He was trying to rob me! I'm all for people taking the initiative but he wasn't offering to do anything more than take a handful of dead leaves away! Lucky I wasn't a little old widow with no options and a purse full of life savings!

13 brilliant observations:

Karen said...

That's insane! I can't imagine what kind of guts it must have taken that guy to actually ask for that much money from you.

I guess desperate times take away our inhibitions.

DeNae said...

So, did he try to sell you a gigantic rock? Because it sounds like he was from the same school of door-to-door guys I met a few years back. I've always felt that the perfect job would be one where people just drove to your house and threw money at it; a promotion might include direct deposit. But I'm beginning to think these guys are doing the next best thing. Way to hold firm, R Max! Just cuz palm fronds grow on trees doesn't mean dinero does!

Kristina P. said...

You should have called me. I would have done it for only $275.

rychelle said...

if only we could actually hear that GET OFF MY LAWN laugh....

Jen said...

Now I'm wishing telemarketers came door to door, because slamming the door sounds so much more rewarding than slamming the phone...

honeypiehorse said...

He probably started off offering to do it for $3 but when you mentioned drachmas he got the wrong idea.

Debbie said...

That guy had a dream and you were in it! That is robbery. Good for you.

Lucy said...

I'm surprised the HOA lets people in to go door to door like that. And I must be the only person around who hates palm trees. They are useless dirty trees and homes for cockroaches. You can't even get shade from them. In Arizona they are not native but people plant them everywhere. I had six of them at my last house. Absolutely hate them.

There! I feel better now.

Lissaloo said...

LOL, I will do it $100! Is my bid the lowest???? :) Too funny, ya gotta watch those scam artists :)

Becky said...

Yeah, I'm pretty sure there is such a laugh and I would have used it too. Three hundred dollars... What was he thinking!?

Machen family said...

He was going to suggest 3 thousand at first, but you talked him down with your eyes.

in time out said...

I think I am commenting on the wrong post. But I love your peeves. Thanks for the smile. Hoping that you are getting better...take care.

Motherboard said...

I love to slam the door in the faces of door to door salesmen. Right after I show them my "No Soliciting" sign on my front door.


Reason #56 as to why I'm going to hell.