Buy Now, Or Else!

Thursday, February 12, 2009 Posted In , , , Edit This 10 Comments »
The housing market sucks. I live on a small street with thirteen houses. Three of them went into foreclosure within months of eachother. Then, people moved into an empty house across the road. Loud parties and night-time brawls became the norm for our formerly quiet little street until the Police raided the house late one night and smashed down the garage door with a battering ram. I heard one almighty racket and ran outside to see what the heck was going on.

MM and the kids were hot on my heels. We counted thirteen police cruisers, numerous cops, guns and dogs. They cuffed two guys that they said were drug dealers. Whoa! I went to sleep in Normal and woke up in Watts!


That was some months back and there is now only one empty house on our street and it's owned by a bank. They sent some guys to spray paint the grass. They think this makes the front yard look more appealing. The lawn used to look like dried up brown straw. Now it looks like dried up freakishly green straw.

But despite the slump in the market, there are still new houses being built two streets over from us! The owners are desperately trying to offload these white elephants. I saw balloons and dancing sign-holder guys and crazy incentives being offered. But then, this week, I saw a sign that said, "Homes Must Sell This Week. Act Fast. LAST CHANCE!" Which naturally, made me wonder... last chance... or what? They'll stay empty? Oh no! Anything but that!


Or, if they don't sell by Sunday, is the Salvation Army going to cart them away? Or, are they turning them into dog kennels for the Friends of the Valley Animal Shelter? Are they going to burn them all down?...take that, all you non-house-buying people! You'll rue the day that you didn't buy a house from me!

I might go over and ask them tomorrow.



10 brilliant observations:

Lucy said...

I don't know. Call me ridiculous, but it seems to me that if they'd stop BUILDING, people would find these empty and foreclosed homes to buy and move into. But no, they have to buy another hundred acres and build MORE houses to eventually have this happen to those. No one has common sense anymore. At least those in authority.

There. I feel better.

Machen family said...

I want to know more about the parties!

DeNae said...

Here in Vegas, the lovely and selfless souls who are losing their homes because they couldn't afford them in the first place are vandalizing the unholy #$@& out of them before moving out. Which is one reason why existing homes aren't selling around here like they otherwise might do.

Everyone's gone insane.

Incidentally, my husband is in law enforcement, and they call battering rams "The Key".

Barbaloot said...

Spray painted grass? Really? That seems so odd.

Kristina P. said...

I don't understand all these new homes still being built!

We went to the Draper Temple open house last weekend, and the houses near the temple are unbelieveable. Monstrosities. And of course, most of them are for sale.

rachel said...

After reading this, I'm totally going to stop watering my lawn and save on $. Obviously, the answer is to spray paint my lawn green...or maybe I'll really freak the neighbors out and paint it red and then every house on my circle will go up for sale!

Lissaloo said...

To funny, we have a mattress store that has had signs like that for 3 years, Last Chance! Going out of business! Great deals! Uh OK, lol :)

Cheryl said...

Next time, have them spray paint it white, then you can all pretend like it snowed, and you'll get your Christmas wish!

honeypiehorse said...

Now, if I were a drug dealer sneaking into a nice abandoned house, would I call attention to myself with wild parties in a house known to be empty?

rychelle said...

oh, maybe i'll move in. i like a lot of police pressence. ;)