New Years Resolutions Rubbish

Thursday, January 01, 2009 Posted In , , , , , , Edit This 5 Comments »
Mark Twain said, "Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving he-- with them as usual."

I have some half-baked resolutions that I doodled on a piece of virtual paper. They will probably hit the apathy wall by January 31st but what the heck, here goes...

1) Be a better Tooth Fairy.
2) Spend at least 10 minutes a day doing something non-computer related.
3) No more "Twilight" bashing. (ha, ha, like that'll happen)
4) Watch more tv. (It's good for the soul)
5) Learn to sew. Make friends with someone who can sew.
6) Buy some Clone Wars rubber duckies. (just because)
7) Cut down on chocolate and ice cream. (don't want to go crazy here)
8) Stop saying "rubbish" all the time. (which is rubbish, really)
9) Don't laugh at other people's misfortune. (unless it's funny)
10) Stop eating. (which will also help with number 7.)

Done!

2009, bring it ON.

Twilight Christmas

Monday, December 22, 2008 Posted In , , Edit This 0 Comments »
Funny Twilight Christmas parody...





Two Chips Off The Old Block

Thursday, December 04, 2008 Posted In , , , , , , Edit This 1 Comment »
C walked in the door from school and announced that she had scored a "Twilight" poster for her sister. She said that her friend had bought the poster this morning for $14.95 (what a rip!) but was sick of it by lunchtime and offered it to C.
I didn't want to dampen her gift-giving enthusiasm but there are virtually no circumstances where I would allow Twilight paraphernalia to be displayed in my house!

The poster features white-faced Edward and klutzy Bella solemnly looking out into space. Not even a hint of a smile. I guess life is just way too serious for them.

It seems sacrilegious to allow an actor who first played the part of "Cedric Diggory" in the 'not to be matched' Harry Potter series, to also play the part of the personality-absent Edward in the travesty that is Twilight. Go figure.
I was very cautious about telling C and A that the poster NEEDS TO GO.
Moi: "Umm, C? That was neat that you got that for A but umm..."
C: "I know, I know... you don't like it."
A: "I hate it anyway. Edward is ugly."
Moi: (gleefully) "Sooo, what are you going to do with it?"
A: "I'm giving it away."

Anybody want a much hated and slightly stomped on Twilight poster like this one?



'Twilight' Verdict

Friday, October 17, 2008 Posted In , , , , , , , Edit This 3 Comments »
So anyway, I gave in to pressure to read Twilight. Luckily it was a quick read. I got through it in one day. I don't usually read books like this and initially I was not enjoying it. But it did get slightly better. In the end, I gave it a solid 4 out of 10.
I know, you're shrieking with disbelief...

The first hundred pages I felt like the author was still trying to figure out how to set the story up. The next couple of hundred pages were slightly better because it seemed Ms Meyer increasingly knew where she was going. The 'vampire falls in love with a human' aspect was a novel one. However, I did not like the intense sexual tension that kept up throughout the whole book. It just made me want to gag.
It wouldn't let up.
Bella's dialogue mainly consists of: "Edward is beautiful and perfect and gorgeous. What stupid thing can I do today to get myself nearly killed? Edward is beautiful and perfect and gorgeous. Edward is a vampire. His instinct is to rip me to shreds. But he's beautiful and perfect and gorgeous. I can't exist without him." On and on...
The speed with which Bella 'fell in love' was unnatural, or at the very least, inadvisable. Bella completely ignored her life (father, school, friends) in favour of worshipping the perfect Edward (who incidentally, only liked her smell). He became her life. What message does this send to the mainly teen female audience?

Although Edward was perfect, he did not have any real personality. Apart from listening to Claire de Lune, and lying in the sun, we don't even find out what Edward likes to do.
One of Edward's comments wins the 'Most Inane' award -"I may not be human but I'm still a man." Huh?

For me, the best part was when Bella was trying to save her life by running from a bad vampire dude. The bad dude cleverly tricks her and she is forced to deal with a dangerous situation by herself. The suspense builds up nicely around her as she plunges (yet again) into mortal danger. This was what rescued the book from a 2 out of 10. The last ten or so pages were actually not too bad.
But... I don't recommend this book.
Sorry.
If you like romance (sometimes I do) I recommend you read (or at least see the 1969 movie of) 'Romeo and Juliet' before you give this one your attention. Then there's 'Pride and Prejudice', not to mention 'Gone With The Wind'.
"Seek ye out of the best books" right?






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